My son the Fraudster

In some ways I worry about my oldest son, in other ways I don’t. For example, I know he will survive in the ‘Big Wide World’. It’s just I’m not totally confident it will be via legal means. He is very, very, very good at making money. A couple of years ago, we went away on a walking holiday with some friends. They are all adults. My son noted that there was a trampoline in the cottage’s garden and bet one of the women on the trip (let’s call her Lucy) that he would get another adult on the trip (let’s call him Peter) to do a seat drop by the end of the holiday. If you knew Peter, who has had back problems, you would know that this is an almost impossible feat. Lucy bet him ten pounds, and waited for the money roll in. A couple of days later, I heard shrieks of delight from the trampoline. I looked out to see Peter, leaping up and down with delight on the trampoline. I decided to investigate further.
‘Hi, so Tom’s teaching you then?’
‘Yes.’ replied Peter happily. ‘It’s a bargain.’ I glanced at my eldest, who looked me straight in the eye.
‘What do you mean, a bargain?’
‘It’s only £2 a session.’ A Marge Simpson-like growl emanated from my lips. Tom tried to look innocent.
By the end of the holiday, Peter had paid him for numerous trampoline sessions and Lucy had lost the bet.
Another instance of his ‘entrepreneurial’ skills was at my fortieth birthday party. I had devised a quiz about the guests at the party so that people would mingle when they tried to find out the answers. Before the party, Tom (seemingly innocently) asked me about the answers. He clarified the ones he knew the answers to and managed to procure the answers he didn’t know. I was busy during the party, but one rather drunken guest told me he was looking forward to the quiz prize. I was a bit confused by this. Then I made the awful discovery. Tom had employed the other children at the party to go round selling the answers to the quiz. He told the guests that is was for charity ‘A child in need’ and that there would be a prize. I was livid. I took him to one side and had a word with him. His only regret was that his cousin had undercut him in price for the amount he was charging for the questions. They say there is a fine line in business between illegal and legal activity. I think he has crossed it


~ by envisioningutopia on December 28, 2011.

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